The Holy Bible begins with the Book of Genesis, which relates some of
humanity's most amazing stories and truths. Yet is a book that starts
with Adam and Eve a good place to turn for marriage counsel? Ponder how
two other marriage stories in Genesis begin (heavily paraphrased):
Esau -- Genesis 26
"Yay! I got married...twice! Both my brides are from different cultures and religions. I guess that is why my parents dislike them. Oh well!"
Jacob -- Genesis 29
"You're telling me I married you and slept with you last night? But I was supposed to marry your sister!"
Right. Wisdom just oozes from these not-so-happily-ever-afters! Well, fear not; Esau and Jacob are not my chosen role models. They were twin brothers who seemed to have problems from the womb to the tomb. I instead want to look at their father Isaac and Jacob's son Joseph. Ponder how their marriage narratives start (heavily paraphrased):
Isaac -- Genesis 24
"Yo Dad! Now that I'm over the hill [40 years old], would you mind sending your servant to another country to pick out a wife for me? She could be my birthday present!"
Joseph -- Genesis 39
"Hey Joe! We [your brothers] hate you. We are going to sell you into slavery, where you will also end up in prison. But don't worry: you'll find a wife among the heathen there!"
Hmm...slightly better. At least Isaac and Joseph were more innocent. But their circumstances seemed pretty terrible -- and certainly undesirable! Yet these two men showed their wives a great deal of respect, and truly were exemplary husbands. Isaac was Joseph's grandfather, so we shall kick off with him.
Isaac was indeed 40 when he got married, according to Genesis 25. This is worth a moment's attention. On the one hand, this was less fantastic in early Bible times than it may be today. Genealogies back in Genesis 5 and 11 indicate that people might have married later by custom in those days. On the other hand, Issac most likely faced puberty and his first sexual temptation long before his 40th year. But the Bible -- which routinely conveys the most grievous sins and weaknesses of even its greatest characters, which I believe is a key proof of its veracity and reliability -- implies that Isaac stayed pure until he married Rebekah. More on purity later.
Intermission
Speaking of Rebekah, let us explore the ten wives in our study for just a moment. For eight of them (and for seven of the husbands), I can find no negative comments in the Bible. Of course, they all sinned -- like all of us, see 1 Kings 8 and Romans 3. In particular, the iniquity of Rebekah and Gomer damaged their marriages.
But overall, these women expressed great courage and faith and so-called "Proverbs 31 Woman" qualities at numerous points in their lives. I believe God redeemed all ten of them, as well as each of their husbands, and all of their marriages displayed a back-and-forth dance of co-sanctification. The Bible does not quibble over these women, and their husbands do not grumble against them, so I won't either. (That was a free tip for you and me, by the way!)
That said, this study aims at encouraging men to do right by their wives. So when I ignore good points in the wives -- such as Ruth's amazing devotion to Naomi, or Hannah's beautiful prayer, or Mary's astonishing faith and humility -- I'm not anti-women! Study these stories and ask for God to give you and your wife a greater understanding of His working in their lives. Read some of the excellent works about these and other famous women of the Bible. Furthermore, when I skip bad points in the husbands -- like Isaac's lie, David's adultery and murder, and Peter's denial of Christ -- I'm not a male chauvinist! Examine these stories closely, too, and avoid all of their sins. I simply want to retain a positive focus on the issues of a man's respect for his woman.
There. Maybe that will silence a critic or two...and probably spark ten more!
Hmm. I should offer one more caveat. I use the New King James Version of the Bible. As needed, I check other translations, but I cite the NKJV in my blog. To all the radical non-King James people out there, since I imagine the number of my critics just doubled: I love you in Christ; and if you study this paragraph carefully, you will note that I have not criticized any other versions of the Bible. And to all the radical King James only people out there, if you study this paragraph carefully, you will note that I respect other versions of the Bible, even though that probably re-doubles the number of my critics yet again. Ah, the life of a writer!
All right, let's get back to the story...
Esau -- Genesis 26
"Yay! I got married...twice! Both my brides are from different cultures and religions. I guess that is why my parents dislike them. Oh well!"
Jacob -- Genesis 29
"You're telling me I married you and slept with you last night? But I was supposed to marry your sister!"
Right. Wisdom just oozes from these not-so-happily-ever-afters! Well, fear not; Esau and Jacob are not my chosen role models. They were twin brothers who seemed to have problems from the womb to the tomb. I instead want to look at their father Isaac and Jacob's son Joseph. Ponder how their marriage narratives start (heavily paraphrased):
Isaac -- Genesis 24
"Yo Dad! Now that I'm over the hill [40 years old], would you mind sending your servant to another country to pick out a wife for me? She could be my birthday present!"
Joseph -- Genesis 39
"Hey Joe! We [your brothers] hate you. We are going to sell you into slavery, where you will also end up in prison. But don't worry: you'll find a wife among the heathen there!"
Hmm...slightly better. At least Isaac and Joseph were more innocent. But their circumstances seemed pretty terrible -- and certainly undesirable! Yet these two men showed their wives a great deal of respect, and truly were exemplary husbands. Isaac was Joseph's grandfather, so we shall kick off with him.
Isaac was indeed 40 when he got married, according to Genesis 25. This is worth a moment's attention. On the one hand, this was less fantastic in early Bible times than it may be today. Genealogies back in Genesis 5 and 11 indicate that people might have married later by custom in those days. On the other hand, Issac most likely faced puberty and his first sexual temptation long before his 40th year. But the Bible -- which routinely conveys the most grievous sins and weaknesses of even its greatest characters, which I believe is a key proof of its veracity and reliability -- implies that Isaac stayed pure until he married Rebekah. More on purity later.
Intermission
Speaking of Rebekah, let us explore the ten wives in our study for just a moment. For eight of them (and for seven of the husbands), I can find no negative comments in the Bible. Of course, they all sinned -- like all of us, see 1 Kings 8 and Romans 3. In particular, the iniquity of Rebekah and Gomer damaged their marriages.
But overall, these women expressed great courage and faith and so-called "Proverbs 31 Woman" qualities at numerous points in their lives. I believe God redeemed all ten of them, as well as each of their husbands, and all of their marriages displayed a back-and-forth dance of co-sanctification. The Bible does not quibble over these women, and their husbands do not grumble against them, so I won't either. (That was a free tip for you and me, by the way!)
That said, this study aims at encouraging men to do right by their wives. So when I ignore good points in the wives -- such as Ruth's amazing devotion to Naomi, or Hannah's beautiful prayer, or Mary's astonishing faith and humility -- I'm not anti-women! Study these stories and ask for God to give you and your wife a greater understanding of His working in their lives. Read some of the excellent works about these and other famous women of the Bible. Furthermore, when I skip bad points in the husbands -- like Isaac's lie, David's adultery and murder, and Peter's denial of Christ -- I'm not a male chauvinist! Examine these stories closely, too, and avoid all of their sins. I simply want to retain a positive focus on the issues of a man's respect for his woman.
There. Maybe that will silence a critic or two...and probably spark ten more!
Hmm. I should offer one more caveat. I use the New King James Version of the Bible. As needed, I check other translations, but I cite the NKJV in my blog. To all the radical non-King James people out there, since I imagine the number of my critics just doubled: I love you in Christ; and if you study this paragraph carefully, you will note that I have not criticized any other versions of the Bible. And to all the radical King James only people out there, if you study this paragraph carefully, you will note that I respect other versions of the Bible, even though that probably re-doubles the number of my critics yet again. Ah, the life of a writer!
All right, let's get back to the story...
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